Young Marine Must Continue To Pay Child Support for a Child That Is Not His

A Belated Valentine: Men Love Just as Powerfully as Women

Research You Requested from Nebraska Legislation

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Young Marine Must Continue To Pay Child
Support for a Child That Is Not His

A Belated Valentine: Men Love Just as
Powerfully as Women

Research You Requested from
Nebraska Legislation
February 15, 2013
Top Story
Young Marine Must Continue To Pay Child Support for a Child That Is Not His
By Richard Lowe, Esq., Member, Fathers and Families

Brandon & Jasmine
Brandon and New Wife Jasmine
Brandon Parsons is a young Marine who fought in Iraq and Afghanistan. On January 22, 2013, San Diego Superior Court Judge Gregory Pollack ruled that Brandon Parsons will have to continue paying child support for another twelve years for another man’s child.

His reason is that Brandon Parsons did not file his request for an order for DNA paternity testing of the child and the mother, Crystal Parsons, until two years after the child’s birth. Because of this delay, Brandon will have to continue paying child support for another twelve years for another man’s child.

Brandon is currently required to pay $1,377 per month, approximately one-third of his income, for a total of $16,524 per year. To date, he has paid over $50,000 to support the child and is on pace to pay over $250,000 before his obligation ends.

The Court found Crystal Parsons’ testimony to be totally untrustworthy. It called her actions in deliberately lying to Brandon about being the father of the child “despicable.” In his written opinion, Judge Pollack states his views as follows: “The court denies the motions of Respondent Brandon Parsons to set aside Judgment and order blood testing to determine paternity. The motions are statutorily untimely under Family Code Section 2122, 7646,7541 and C.C.P. Section 473. The Paternity determination set forth within the 2009 martial dissolution judgment stipulated to by father, is res judicata and not subject to an equitable set aside.”

The court concludes that the Father was, in fact, despicably duped and victimized by Petitioner Crystal Parsons’ fraudulent concealment regarding biological paternity, a deception which has placed a significant, continuing financial burden upon the Father. Existing law, however, as applied to the facts of this case, precludes the court from setting aside the prior paternity determination. Unless the law is changed in this area, the fact pattern in this case represents the rare situation where the jurisprudence maxims of Civil Code Section 3517 (“No one can take advantage of [her] own wrong.”) and Civil Code Section 3523 (“For every wrong there is a remedy.”) are, regrettably, untrue.

Brandon has remarried and is now faced with having to struggle to take care of his family while paying for Crystal Parsons’ love child. He was targeted by Crystal Parsons because she was pregnant and had no money to cover the medical expenses associated with the birth of the child. He was a young Marine from Minnesota stationed at Camp Pendleton, Oceanside, California, when he met Crystal. She told him that because she was saving herself for marriage, they could not have relations.

According to the declaration of Brandon Parsons, she was sleeping with other men, however, and when she found out that she was pregnant, she quickly arranged to have relations with Brandon. Seventeen days later, she announced to him that she was pregnant. The medical benefits he could provide were far too tempting for her to resist. She simply lied to Brandon and went through with the wedding knowing she was laying the burden of supporting her lover’s child on Brandon.

This is the conduct the court found to be despicable. During his divorce proceedings in November 2008, he signed a waiver of his rights under the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act. This Act would have tolled all statutes of limitation against him, but since it had been waived, we had to argue for relief under the court’s equitable powers. Unfortunately, Judge Pollack refused to exercise his powers of equity and right this wrong.

Despite Judge Pollack’s strong language, Crystal Parsons has actually filed a motion asking the court to order Brandon to pay $8,535 to the lawyer she hired to defend her lies. This motion is continued to May 9, 2013. We have already decided that if she is awarded a penny in attorney fees, we will take it to the Supreme Court, if necessary.

Note: Fathers and Families has a vibrant group of volunteers getting organized in California. There is a lot of work to be done on our issues. please email Rita Fuerst Adams if you would like to join in.

A Belated Valentine: Men Love Just as Powerfully as Women
By Helen Fisher — Originally published in "Edge — 2013 : WHAT *SHOULD* WE BE WORRIED ABOUT?"

Dr. Helen Fisher
Dr. Helen Fisher
Scientists and laymen have spent the last 50 years dispelling myths about women. I worry that journalists, academics, and laymen will continue to perpetuate an equal number of myths about men. Annually in 2010, 2011, and 2012, I have conducted a national survey of singles, in collaboration with a US dating service. Together we designed a questionnaire with some 150 queries (many with up to 10 sub-questions) and polled over 5,000 single men and women. We did not sample the members of the dating site; instead we collected data on a national representative sample based on the US census. All were “never married,” divorced, widowed, or separated; none were engaged, “living together,” or in a serious relationship. Included were the appropriate number of blacks, whites, Asians and Latinos, gays, lesbians, bisexuals and heterosexuals, rural, suburban and urban folks, and men and women from every age group (21 to 71+) and every region of the United States.

These data paint a different portrait of men than do America’s chattering class.
  • Men are just about as eager to marry as women.
  • Men aren’t “players” either. Men are just as eager to find a partner; indeed, men find loneliness just as stressful.
  • Men are far less picky in their search. Women are the picky gender.
  • Men fall in love faster too — perhaps because they are more visual.
  • Men experience love at first sight more regularly; and men fall in love just as often.
  • Men are faster to introduce their new partner to friends and parents, more eager to kiss in public, and want to “live together” sooner.
  • Men have more intimate conversations with their wives than women do with their husbands, because women have many of their intimate conversations with their girlfriends.
  • Men are just as likely to believe you can stay married to the same person forever.
  • Men are 2.5 times more likely to kill themselves after a break up.
Women seek more independence when in a committed relationship; want more personal space; are less eager to share their bank account; are more eager to have “girls night out;” and are more likely to want to vacation with their female buddies.

Both men and women “must have” a partner whom they can trust, someone in whom they can confide, and someone who treats them with respect. These three requirements top the list for both genders in all years. Marriage has changed more in the last 50 years than in the last 10,000. Men, like women, are now turning away from traditional family customs, instead seeking companionship and self-fulfillment.

Helen E. Fisher, PhD, biological anthropologist, is a Research Professor in the Department of Anthropology at Rutgers University. She has written five books on the evolution and future of human sexuality, monogamy, adultery and divorce, gender differences in the brain, the chemistry of romantic love, and most recently, human personality types, and why we fall in love with one person rather than another. In her newest work, she reports on four biologically-based personality types, and using data on 28,000 people collected on the dating site, she explores who you are and why you are chemically drawn to some types more than others.

Research You Requested from Nebraska Legislation

Many readers have written to ask Fathers and Families to share the research member Ray Keiser cited in his article about Shared Parenting Legislation submitted in Nebraska. Here are the studies for you to use when you contact legislators and perhaps in your own case:

Family Law — Maternal and Joint Custody Presumptions for Unmarried Parents: Constitutional and Policy Considerations in Massachusetts and Beyond

Shared Parenting after Divorce: A Review of Shared Residential Parenting Research

Integrating Parenting Time Research into Child Custody Evaluations
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Members have contacted Fathers and Families asking how to make gifts directly from their brokerage accounts. If you wish to make your end of the year gift with securities, you may use this form to transfer securities directly to Fathers and Families brokerage account, or you may contact Rita for assistance at 617.542.9300 ext. 3, or email.

Fathers and Families is a Shared Parenting Organization
Fathers and Families is a non-profit organization that is educating the public, families, educators, and legislators about the importance of shared parenting and how it can reduce conflict in children, parents and extended families. If you would like to get involved in our organization, you can do so several ways. First, we would love to have you as an official member of the Fathers and Families team. Second, Fathers and Families is an organization that believes in the importance of using social media as a means to spread the word about shared parenting and other topics, and you can visit us on our Facebook Page to learn more about our efforts. Last, we hope you will share this newsletter with other families using the many social networking sites so that we can bring about greater awareness of shared parenting. Thank you for your support.

Fathers and Families improves the lives of children and strengthens society by protecting the child’s right to the love and care of both parents after separation or divorce. We seek better lives for children through family court reform that establishes equal rights and responsibilities for fathers and mothers.

Fathers and Families
Fathers and Families
PO Box 270760
Boston, Massachusetts 02127-0760
(617) 542-9300
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Volunteer Testimonial

"As an involved grandparent, nothing gives me more satisfaction than working for the next generation of children in Connecticut. National Parents Organization brings like-minded people together to improve outcomes for the children of divorce, and unites Connecticut groups with those working on this cause in other states. Now we are proposing changes to Connecticut’s Child Support Guidelines. The proposed Guidelines empower both parents to maintain households and pay for expenses associated with child rearing. The term “empowered” is important, since they benefit from seeing parents who have responsibility and the means to exercise this responsibility."

By John M. Clapp, Member, Connecticut Executive Committee: