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NPO publishes blog articles to inform and to stimulate conversation about issues of importance to NPO's mission.  All blog articles express the opinions of the authors as individuals and do not necessarily reflect the views of National Parents Organization, its Board of Directors, or its executives.  

April 27, 2016
By Ned Holstein, MD, MS, Founder and Acting Executive Director, National Parents Organization

I have to admit this is not news. But we just came across it for the first time, courtesy of one of our members, and thought you’d be interested.

Judge Judy, whose full name is Judy Sheindlen, wrote a book in 1996 titled “Don’t Pee on My Leg and Tell Me It’s Raining,” and it includes a chapter called “Custody Wars are Battles Without Winners.” Here were some of her observations long before there was a strong family court reform movement. Pay special attention to her last comment.

"American fathers are led down a primrose path every day in our family courts, often with disastrous legal results. They wind up in the Land of Gender Bias, where they are systematically stripped of their rights, often without the slightest idea of why it is happening to them."

"If you think the mother-father disparity is outrageous, consider the sexual abuse syndrome, and how it affects visitation and custody disputes. Here, the judicial impotence and chronic blindness to men's rights would appall you."

"Courts are supposed to approach cases of child custody, support payments, and visitation rights in what we call a gender-neutral posture. It sounds fair, and it is fair. But it is a myth. Judges are not enforcing these gender laws fairly, and few seem to care."

"We will see more of these problems until fathers organize to demand fairer treatment. So get it together dads: You have a legitimate legal beef and you need to make this a public issue. Right now the courts don't hear you."

Judge Judy was telling you 20 years ago that if you are passive, it will only get worse, which it did. It is time to get active by recruiting other members such as family and friends, supporting us financially, and participating in email and telephone campaigns to influence legislators and media.

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