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Fathers and Families

Grilling Dads, Shared Parenting Still Teetering,
Grandparents’ Rights, Enforcing Child Support Fees
May 24, 2012
Top Story
Don’t Grill the Hot Dog That Grills Dads
Ned Holstein
Ned Holstein
The Oscar Mayer ad campaign is “everything a man could wish for. The wife in the series is smart, energetic, decisive, sensible and cute, and she finally says ‘Yes.’ Unfortunately, when she finally says ‘Yes,’ it’s not what you might hope for; it’s for Oscar Mayer hot dogs for dinner,” said Ned Holstein, MD, MS, Founder and Chair, Fathers and Families.

He continued, “And here’s an advance warning: the Dad is everything you have come to expect from television dads: infantile, inept, narcissistic, befuddled, sloppy and balding, stupid, insecure, and timidly subservient to his wife. I envy the skill that Hollywood and Madison Avenue bring to their work; it takes something near genius to convey all that in a 30 second spot. But they manage to do it.”

So why would Oscar Mayer bash Dads? Do Mom’s do all the grocery shopping? What happened to the cheery Oscar Mayer song of the 1970’s –?
“My bologna has a first name, it’s O-S-C-A-R. 
My bologna has a second name, it’s M-A-Y-E-R. 
Oh, I love to eat it every day.
And if you ask me why I’ll say…
‘Cuz Oscar Mayer has a way ..
With B-O-L-O-G-N-A.”
Fathers and Families does not have the answer to these questions. But, we do have a suggestion for Dads’ response to advertisers that bash Dads. Buy another brand!

Don’t Grill the Hot Dog - Oscar Mayer - That Grills Dads!

Buy any cold cut or hot dog - other than Oscar Mayer. 

Post your ban on your Facebook page.  Tweet your friends.

Join Oscar Mayer’s community and let them know what you think of their ads

According to Tom Bick, Director of Marketing Communications & Advertising at Oscar Mayer, in a press release, “We’re now poking fun at the messy, imperfect moments experienced daily as we struggle to make better choices. This allows us to show that Oscar Mayer Selects is an easy and delicious choice when it comes to breakfast, lunch or dinner.”

Zach Rosenberg, 8bitdad, on the other hand describes these ads:
“Styled like a campaign that should be called “Sh*t My Family Never Says,” mom plays the part of stone-faced buzzkill while dad is just one of the kids:

“In this commercial for hot dogs, we see that dad is a buffoon. Dad wants the family vacation in Vegas and is ready to let his kid risk his life with a chainsaw. Mom is painted as so rigid that even the husband’s sexual advances are treated with boldface rejection. A real wife (or husband) would have laughed and told their spouse to save it for later. And I’m sorry, but my wife wants a large television just as much as I do. The daughter is featured once trying to sneak out for a late-night date, probably because she feels bad that dad’s taking so much heat with his bad decisions.

“But that’s not the only wiener on the chopping block. Oh no, there’s another commercial:

Molly Olson
“This time, idiot-dad wants to be Facebook friends with the babysitter, and wants to wear skinny jeans. Kids are featured more prominently in this one – the son finds a mouse in the shed that he’d like to keep as a pet, and the daughter opens the minivan door to find the parents making out inside (we thought mom wasn’t into dad like that). But in the climax of the commercial, dad asks ”is it okay if I quit my job and start a blog?”

“No, of course not. Don’t be an idiot. Go to sleep dad – mom is in control. What’s something mom gets to say “yes” about? “Cold cuts from a package.” Snore.”
Ned Holstein says that we should be especially wary of this image in the coming month. “Get ready for more of this kind of thing in the print media: Father’s Day is getting close. Once you are attuned to dad-bashing, you will be amazed at how much of it there is on Dad’s Special Day.”

MN Shared Parenting Still Teetering
Minnesota is still waiting for Governor Mark Dayton to sign HF 322 requiring that each parent get a minimum of 35% of the parenting time — including during temporary orders. This is the only legislation passed this session the governor has yet to sign.

Call his office today! Even if you have read this and called before. Call again. Telephone Governor Dayton’s office at (651) 201-3400 and politely request that he sign HF322 and make shared parenting the norm in Minnesota.

Both the Minnesota State Senate and Minnesota House have passed bills.

Now the bill known as HF322 sits on Governor Mark Dayton’s desk, awaiting his signature. As always, special-interests are working to persuade the Governor to veto the bill.

Molly Olson
Molly Olson
Molly Olson and her husband created the Center for Parental Responsibility (CPR) in Minnesota, and have been tireless advocates for shared parenting for a dozen years. Late night meetings, endless meetings at the Statehouse, giving up income opportunities, tens of thousands of telephone calls, training volunteers, putting personal money into the movement.

If you have any questions about this process, feel free to telephone me at (617) 542-9300 extension 1. I will be pleased to speak with you about this important Minnesota legislation and how we are making changes in other states.

If you want more detail, you will find a great story by Fathers and Families’ Robert Franklin, Esq. at

Together with you in the love of our children,
Ned Holstein, MD, MS
Founder and Chair of the Board, Fathers and Families

Georgia Grants Grandparents Rights
Georgia HB 1198 increases the visitation rights of grandparents whose grandchildren are entangled in cases involving child custody, divorce or the termination of parental rights.

John Meadows
John Meadows
Representative John Meadows, Republican and grandfather to twins, introduced the legislation. It gives judges the power to allow visitation between grandparents and children. It will be used most heavily in cases where grandparents have financially supported a child for at least a year or have spent regular time visiting them.

It provides an opportunity for grandparents to seek visitation in cases where the parent is deceased, incapacitated, incarcerated, or otherwise unable to exercise his or her discretion regarding a decision to permit grandparent visitation. The legislation also instructs judges considering visitation to consider whether the grandparents paid more than half the child’s living expenses or had kept the child in their home for at least six months.

This does not allow grandparents to file separate cases seeking to establish visitation, as Georgia supreme court declared such laws unconstitutional several years ago.

Texas Balances Budget Enforcing Child Support Fees
Texas Attorney General
The Texas Attorney General is now charging $3 for every child support payment that goes through the State Disbursement Unit, the program that handles child support payments.

After just eight months in place that $3 fee has brought more than $2.2 million. In 2011 it cost Texas $13.1 million dollars to run the State Disbursement Unit.

In the past Texas used tax dollars and federal funds to support the system. But after state budgets were slashed a year ago, new legislation went into effect in September 2011 allowing the Texas Attorney General to charge parents for using this program.

In addition to this, there is an annual $25 fee that some parents may face if they have full service cases with the Texas Attorney General and the custodial parents have never received Temporary Assistance for Needy Families.

Cases that involve custodial parents who have received Temporary Assistance for Needy Families must us the State Disbursement Unit. Those who have not received such assistance have the option whether or not to use it.

Of course, Texas is just one more state charging fees to collect child support. Federal law requires all states to impose a $25 annual service fee on cases that involve custodial parents who have never received Temporary Assistance for Needy Families. The fee is imposed for each year that a parent receives at least $500 in child support.

Until September 30, 2011, the State of Texas paid the fee for parents. Texas has paid more than $25 million to the federal government to cover the annual fees. On their website, the Texas Attorney General explains why these fees are being imposed now.
In the News
Mother Returns Adopted Child to Russia

Utah Adoption Agencies Cut Out Fathers

Shared Parenting Benefits Children

Men Prove to Be ‘Rock Solid‘ Fathers

Sanction Mothers Violating Child ‘Visitation’ Orders

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Fathers and Families is interested in updating its marketing materials. A creative graphic designer is needed to accomplish this. Could you volunteer your time, talents, and creativity? If yes, please email me. I look forward to hearing from you. If yes, please email me.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Rita Fuerst Adams
National Executive Director

Fathers and Families improves the lives of children and strengthens society by protecting the child’s right to the love and care of both parents after separation or divorce. We seek better lives for children through family court reform that establishes equal rights and responsibilities for fathers and mothers.

Fathers and Families’ vision is a society in which:
  • Children are happier and more successful because their loving bonds are protected after parental separation or divorce:

  • Children have a natural right to be nurtured and guided by both parents:

  • Society treats fathers and mothers as equally important to the wellbeing of their children:

  • Shared parenting after separation or divorce is the norm:

  • The courts arrange finances after separation or divorce so that both mothers and fathers can afford to house and care for their children and themselves: and

  • Our society understands and respects the essential role of fathers.

Core Principles
Our core principles are:
  • Shared Parenting: Shared parenting protects children’s best interests and the loving bonds children share with both parents after separation or divorce.

  • Parental Equality: Equality between genders has been extended to every corner of American society, with one huge exception: family courts and the related agencies.

  • Respect for Human and Property Rights: The Supreme Court of the United States has found that “the interest of parents in the care, custody, and control of their children... is perhaps the oldest of the fundamental liberty interests recognized by this Court.”

Fathers and Families
Fathers and Families
PO Box 270760
Boston, Massachusetts 02127-0760
(617) 542-9300
[email protected]

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